In May, June and half of July, we hardly thought of the call, knowing it'll probably come late July or early August. And so the waiting wasn't too hard. Besides, we were busy enjoying the summer and all the activities that come with it (most of it being camping, as some of you may know if you read my other blog).
It wasn't until the third week of July that we started to think a bit more about it. It didn't help that we knew of another patient of his, who saw him on the same day in May as Keziah, received a call for surgery on the first day of October. We assumed by that, that our call was next. Yeah, that was a month ago now and still no call.
I emailed Dr. Zuker at the beginning of August and thankfully he responded last week. His response came the same the day that I had the phone in my hand to call his office. I just didn't dare though because I didn't want to be a nuisance. It's not like he isn't busy!! Well, later that day, I received an email from him. He told me he has talked to a few dermatologists and none of them, and neither has he, ever heard of this "hair loss" from the nevus. In his email he stated that he is still reading up on it and is still seeking to talk to some other experts. So I guess until he has researched it as best as he can, we won't be heading to the Operating Room any time soon. I guess he doesn't believe me that we have seen via pictures, as well as met someone who has experienced hair loss? Either way, I am just glad he is the type of surgeon that likes to look into things before going ahead with something he is not familiar with.
Knowing that she hasn't been forgotten and that he is still researching has made waiting easier again. But today I found myself in tears. Jealous tears. Tears that spring up out of envy for those who have started a similar journey before hers and are done; tears of impatience as we just want this journey to start again so that we are closer to the end. However, these tears are not healthy ones and are not beneficial to anyone. Because really, in the whole scheme of things, her journey is really not that long and definitely, most importantly, not life-threatening. I am just being impatient and want to be done!
So while we still yet wait, please pray for us, that we are more patient as we wait. We know everything is in God's timing, but it is just so hard to live that out. Having gone through infertility and adoption, you would think I'd be used to that....to trust and be rest assured that all things will come about when and if He wills. But once again, I find I am struggling with this. I just have to keep praying, because prayer always puts things back into the proper perspective.
It's really funny though, because on one hand I bemoan the fact that it is taking too long to get this show back on the road, and on the other hand I can't believe how fast time goes!! That's what happens when someone very special just celebrated her 4th birthday!
How did she go from this:
to this?!?! Seriously, where has the time gone?
That's right. Time does not go any slower or faster. It just seems like it does, depending on what our wants and our (what we think) needs are.
I will leave off with these verses that I am memorizing:
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4: 6)
and
Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? (Matthew 6:27).
Can't get more blunt than that, eh? Ah, God's Word and Truth. So reliable every.single.time.
